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Posts tagged ‘healthy’

USING SEX AS A TOOL IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Are you the type of person that is always taking and never giving? Do you seek sex from your spouse for the pure enjoyment of getting your rocks off, and not being mindful of your spouse’s need?
We need to understand that we all have needs, and we must learn to be respectful of our partners. Sex is primarily a spiritual act of oneness symbolized with a physical act. For it to be a blessing in marriage, there needs to be emotional and spiritual wholeness, free of domination, manipulation and control from either spouse.

Emotional wounding or bondage in either person will damage and distort sexual intimacy. To have a healthy sexuality, you need complete trust, mutual respect and appreciation of each other which leads to oneness of body, soul and spirit. This creates a godly sexual soul tie. An ungodly sexual soul tie occurs when sexuality becomes a tool of control. Yes, there can be an ungodly sexual soul tie even in Christian marriage. There can even be sexual abuse in Christian marriage, which is covered up by insisting on the scriptural submission of women to the will of the male.

Know in your heart, that it is a sin to dominate, manipulate or control a spouse in any way, including sexuality. It shows disrespect and treats the person as an object to meet the emotional needs of the other.

Sexuality can be used as a tool of punishment or reward to control the other spouse. When it is used as a way of reassuring yourself of worth or acceptance, it can easily become an addiction that drives you for more. A very simple test of sexuality is to ask yourself this question, “during sex are you lovingly giving yourself to your spouse or taking what you believe to be rightfully yours?” If you are taking then you are on dangerous ground!

In my observation, most sexual problems are emotional and spiritual, not physical. The solution is the healing of our wounds. We need to learn to love unconditionally. When we can detach ourselves from believing that we have total control of our spouses’ body, mind and soul and learn to trust and give them the love and respect they deserve, then we are on our way to learning the greatest lesson of all. “The art of a lover is to make the love last as long as possible.” Capture the spirit of this sentence and you capture the meaning of learning how to love unconditionally. In any relationship, this is the greatest challenge of all. However, it is one that we must learn to embrace, and understand if we are to have a complete loving and romantic life together as one.

Using Sex as a tool to control your spouse will only destroy any love that was developed in the relationship from the beginning.  Sooner are later your spouse is going to get tire of being used and abused and the results is going to end in disaster.  Learn to build respect between you and your spouse, and give without expecting anything in return.  Know that God is love, and He commands us to love our neighbor as ourselves.  That simply means loving our spouse and their bodies as we would love our self and our own bodies.

 

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I ENCOURAGE YOU TO BE STRONG

Know that this day you are a child of the King, and as such you are precious in His sight. Nothing in life is ever promised to be easy, but the joy of it all is being able to experience the pain without feeling the hurt. No pain, no gain. What we come to understand about this life is that God will never put on us more than we can bear. He also promised that He would never leave us are forsake us, and that is one check you can take to the bank and it forever pay you more than enough dividends to live on for the rest of your earthy life.

I have been there. I have experienced some of what you are now experiencing, but today I am encouraging you to remain strong, the devil wants to destroy your mind by taking you down the road of negativity, and if you give him half a chance he will defeat you.

Let me share with you some thoughts I hope that can encourage you and lift you up and fill your heart with peace.

Years ago, I learned an invaluable lesson; Whatever we focus on, we become. That simple statement taught me a great deal. Wherever we put our energies or our attention, those things will develop. Another way I like to say it is, “Where the mind goes, the mind follows!”
If I begin to think about ice cream, I will soon find myself in my car pursuing ice cream. My thought will stir my desires and emotions, and I will make the decision to follow them.
If we focus only on the negative things in our lives, we become negative people. Everything, including our conversation, becomes negative. We soon lose our joy and live miserable lives and it all started with our own thinking.

You might be experiencing some problems in life not realizing that you are creating them yourself by what you’re choosing to think about. I challenge you to think about what you’re thinking about!
You might be discouraged and even depressed and wonder what caused it. Yet if you will examine your thought life, you will find that you are feeding the negative emotions you are feeling. Negative thoughts are fuel for discouragement, depression, and many other unpleasant emotions.
We should choose our thoughts carefully. We can think about what is wrong with our lives or about what is right with them. We can think about what is wrong with all the people we are in relationship with or we see the good and meditate on that. The Bible teaches us to always believe the best. When we do that, it makes our own lives happier and more peaceful.

I have a great life, I have wonderful children and many beautiful loving grand children. I have been blessed and am privileged to be used by God to bless millions of people around the world through the wonderful ministry He has given me. But life isn’t perfect, and if I had allowed the devil to fill my mind with negative thoughts as he once did long ago, I would have been defeated.
I want to focus on God’s grace and give thanks for all the good things in my life. I don’t want to focus on what I don’t have.

An old friend used to quote this saying: “As you wander on through life, brother, whatever be your goal, keep your eye upon the donut and not upon the hole.” Too many people focus on what’s not here and what’s not right.

All of this is to say that our thoughts largely determine our destiny. Our thoughts also determine our happiness. Proverbs 23:7 is one of my favorite verses. Thoughts are powerful. They aren’t just words that flow through our minds. So it is very important for us to decide what we will allow to rest inside our minds.

We must not forget that the mind is a battlefield. We must always remember that our adversary will use it in any way he possibly can to trap us. To put it another way, we can’t have a positive life and a negative mind. Our thoughts, our focus are what determine where we end up.
Jesus, our friend and Savior, wants our minds to be filled with positive, beautiful, and healthy thoughts. The more we focus on those things, the more readily we defeat Satan’s attacks.
My Maximized Prayer for you today is this; our most high, ever loving and patient God, I ask You to forgive me for focusing my thoughts on things that are not pleasing to You. I pray that You will help me fill my mind with thoughts that are clean and pure and uplifting. Strengthen me in my time of weakness; lift me up so that I may continue to see the beauty in all things that are before me. In Jesus name, Amen.

Peace, power, purpose and prosperity will fill your day, this I bless to you with all my love.
Davis

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